I’d say I had an incorrect view.
Instead of seeing it as a toy that you could play with,
then throw it away when it seems to no longer serve its purpose
See it as friendship.
That there is no “done”.
There is evolving, and changing and loving
But no trashing.
To let it be there because it was meant to be there.
It was meant to run parallel to your race course.
Perhaps this adjustment makes it less unpredictable, and less wavering.